Tag Archives: Internet

Get A Room!

On the phone Hi! Sarah (of SarahDoesPhoneSex.com) here and for my inaugural post here on Fairy Whore Mother, I want to share a fabulous tool that was recommended to me (by @MissEmmaMcG of KinkandCode.com) that has made Client-On-Cam sessions a freaking breeze. More on this in a bit. As a Phone Sex Operator (PSO) working primarily on platforms (like Niteflirt, TalkToMe, etc.), I don’t offer WebCam as a service. However, if I did, honestly I think I’d use a site that had the functionality to handle the whole transaction within the web browser itself, as opposed to having to utilize third party services (like Skype or various IM programs) to connect with the Client. And there are a variety of points I’d bring up about that, but I’m trying to keep this positive and not get distracted with too many side rants, so I’ll save that whole can of beans for another day.

But the thing that really bugs me about offering WebCam sessions (through phone sex platforms) is that without fail, they’re a huge pain in the ass to pull off. I use Skype to take my PSO calls. I did that on purpose. One of my goals in becoming a full time PSO is that eventually I’ll be able to do it from anywhere (as long as I have a good internet connection). So using Skype to watch a client’s webcam doesn’t work for me. And I refuse to download a bunch of IM programs. Yahoo? AIM? ICQ? I’m sorry, is 1999 calling? No.

And I realize that not using the tech old guys are comfortable with is probably hurting my business potential a bit. But I’m OK with that. Know why? Because of the inevitable threads I see on forums complaining about how clients abuse the fuck out of it. Selling that Skype ID for a few bucks may seem like a good idea now, but just wait till you’re getting endless messages asking if you’ll take Paypal or messaging you while you’re in the middle of a session with another client. And heaven help you if you have multiple characters to juggle.

Ever since settling on that little internal policy for how I run my business, if someone expresses interest in having me watch them on webcam. I offered Google Hangouts as my solution. Obviously this has it’s own trials and tribulations (they have to have a Gmail account or make one for naughty porn purposes, they have to be relatively tech savvy, etc.). And while I’ll admit I’m a pretty big Google fan girl, their user experience isn’t without t’s own issues either. But it made do. That is until I found about about Room.co.

OK, now pause, cause we need to get this little cautionary blurb out of the way. Room has a Terms of Service that clearly states that using their site for commercial and/or adult entertainment purposes is not kosher. *gasp* *shock* *feigned surprise* But seriously what modern tools are we in the adult entertainment industry allowed to use without violating the hell out all kinds of legalese? So use it at your own risk. And when it becomes a for pay service, please remember to support it with your cash (note: I’m not in any way affiliated with the site, so no agenda here) to help influence legit companies to embrace sextech as an under served customer base starving for innovation.

Now for the fun stuff. Why do I love this site so much?

  • No Downloads: Everything happens in the browser.
  • No Signup For Client: They don’t have to signup for anything. All they do is click the link you send them for the room and they get transported into the video call under a silly automatically generated anonymous moniker.
  • Tech Agnostic: Works on Google Chrome, Mozilla Firefox, and Apple (iPhone & iPad). That way everyone gets to play in their preferred tech playground. I also really love that they didn’t cater to Apple users to the determent of Android users (as so many developers do).
  • Intuitive User Interface: Simple by design. It doesn’t try and reinvent the wheel. The designers have embraced the conventions we’ve all been trained to look for through past internet experience to be able to very quickly navigate the various functions available.
  • Rename & Save Rooms: Have a repeat client? Make them their very own room and save the URL as a bookmark. Now you never ever have to worry about if they have the right URL or not (I’m looking at you Google Hangouts).
  • Text Chat: More than just a video conference / webcam tool, you can also type back and forth and share URLs with each other… privately.
  • Screen Share: Ever had a client that likes to watch porn with you? This makes it a cake walk.
  • Up To 4 People: I haven’t done this yet, but the thought has crossed my mind that this would be a way to do a session with a client that wanted to play with multiple entertainers at the same time or maybe play with 2 clients at the same time (long distance couples?). Not sure how often this feature would get used, but the option is there, and I like that.
  • Oh, and did I mention, it’s FREE!

Thanks for reading. I hope this will help take your sexwork business to the next level. Did you try out Room? What did you think? What did your Client think? Share your thoughts with me and the rest of the Fairy Whore Mother gang on Twitter (@FWMother & @SarahDoesPhSex).

Sarah Does Phone Sex, is a phone sex operator. You can find Sarah on Twitter, read her blog or even give her a call.


4 things you can do when your advertising venue disappears

Panic!You woke up one morning to find the main place, your go to advertising venue, where you advertised for your escort business has suddenly disappeared. It’s gone, vanished, poof… into the mist! It’s normal to feel panic when something like this happens to you and it does happen. It happens more often than people think. You don’t know what to do. How will you make a living? What options do you have to advertise? How will you eat and keep a roof over your head. Before you do anything drastic like walk the streets and put yourself into harms way or see un-screened possibly unsafe clients take a deep breath, a big step back and think.  There are always other options available to you. One website isn’t the end all be all in escort advertising even if that website had a bit of a monopoly on the local market. There are other ways, other options in how to make things work for you and your escort business. You just have to find them.

1. Find new advertising

Hopefully you didn’t have all your eggs in one advertising basket. Sometimes though there is only one good place to advertise in a city or rather one place that has all the business. If you find that place isn’t there any longer then it’s time to find a new advertising venue. Google your city +escorts or any combination there of and look at all the new possible places for you to put up an ad. If the old place that no longer exists was free to advertise and everything else costs then time to pay up. Welcome to the big leagues, the real world where you have to invest in your business. Its called the cost of doing business and its now time to step up your game. You want to chose wisely, don’t go giving your hard earned cash over to just anyone. Do some homework, pick a new place, pay for an ad and most of all, track your results. If it doesn’t work then dump it and try a different one. Try the high end glossy website with expensive ads, try the down and dirty classified ad style site. See what works for you. Be aware that everyone else who used that site is also looking for new advertising too and keep that in the back of your mind while you pick out some new places to advertise. The worlds oldest profession isn’t going go away just because one website is gone. That business will migrate somewhere else, you just have to find it. If your regular advertising site went away because of government interference, your potential clients might be a little gun shy as well and not want to come out to play until things calm down, so maybe the next option is better suited for you.

2. Tour

Get the hell out of dodge for a while, try something new. Go to a new town and make a killing. Turn adversity into profit. Chose your city wisely, don’t go where 100 other girls are all flocking to because they are in the same position as you are. Check out some possible 2nd tier cities or maybe even 3rd tier. Be creative hit a few different places or find one and stick to it and turn in into a working vacation. Odds are you need a vacation anyways.

3. Network with other sex workers

Ask your peers what they are doing to weather this storm. Other sex workers can often be your best resource. Don’t copy them outright though or you might find that you no longer get any support or guidance from them. Ask them how they are handling the change, see if you can glean any insight. You might find their answers enlightening.

4.  Try other kinds of work

Always wanted to give exotic dancing a try? Nows your chance! How about looking into web-camming or of you’re really bold look into acting in some adult films. None of that appeals to you? Then how about looking for a real job (provided you don’t already have one) dust off the resume and see what the big bad world has to offer you. It doesn’t have to be forever and no you wont get paid hundreds of dollars an hour but you might make enough to keep  roof over your head and the lights on for a while until you figure out your next steps.

It can be a scary thing when something you’ve come to rely such as advertising on is suddenly gone. It can and does happen from time to time, this is good reason to diversify your options moving forward. Never put all your eggs in one basket because this business is ever changing, always under attack and you don’t want to find yourself in a tight spot when then change hits you or your city.

Jenny DeMilo: Dominatrix, Hypno-Domme and former GFE Escort

Follow Jenny DeMilo on Twitter

How to spend your advertising dollars

PWoman-holding-bag-of-money-via-Shutterstockaying for advertising sucks, but it is necessary. All successful business pay for advertising and sex work is no different from any other business. Spending your money wisely.. now thats the hard part. It’s hard to know what works and what doesn’t and there’s a lot of superstition involved in sex work advertising. Especially because where you are getting your clients from is often hard to know.  As a result people tend to keep ads up that are not working for them just because they always had them or out of fear that if they make a change their work will slow. Remember just because you like or don’t like a  specific site or because they are friendly to sex workers ( they all should be as you are their clients)  is not reason to keep yourself off it or put yourself on a specific website. You are in this business to make money and advertising is a business decision. If the money you invest in ads pays off then it’s a good investment, if its not paying off how you want then you need to find something that works better for you. A lot of trial and error is involved in sex work advertising, a lot. Set yourself a monthly budget and get to putting up and tracking your ads. Keep in mind that spending your hard earned cash wisely is the key.. so here are some tips to help you get more for your advertising dollar.

1. Track your web hits: Do this! Seriously do it now, right now. Tracking your web hits will often give you the best picture of how people are finding you. What keywords / search terms they are using to find your clip site, your escort site, your blog, etc. Where are you getting link referrals.  (Protip: this is also a good way to see who’s sharing your files if you are a clip producer) If you are paying a company big bucks for an ad and no one is clicking over from that site to your site, then you’re not spending your money well. Not at all, not one wee little bit. You must use all the tools available to you and tracking your web hits is A number one.

2. Ask your clients: Be aware that they often don’t know, cant remember or just plain will lie  about it but it never hurts to ask. When I would get a phone calls, I would always ask “Where did you see my ad?” Often they would say some site I wasn’t listed on cuz they can be stupid, but a lot of the time they would tell me where they actually saw my ad and if i was real lucky what they liked about my ad and why they were moved to call. Bonus! Asking where your ad was found is also a good way to track your bullshit callers too. If the time-wasters are always telling you they saw you on site X well then maybe its time to take your ad off that site. Its not doing you any good and in fact its wasting your time. d=Dealing with time wasters all the time contributes to sex worker burn out in a big way.

01USDA wise veteran escort friend of mine told me way back in the day when I was a baby ho how to figure out where to place my ads and it holds true today, maybe even more so. Do a Google search as if you were a client looking for an escort to see. Google: Escorts, Los Angeles or Escorts, Washington DC or escorts and whatever city/state you happen to be working in. Now look at those sites, you should have a presence on most of them. There will be a mix of junk sites, mall sites and review sites. So take a little time and look them over. Someone is always trying to capitalize on what they think is escort cash cow money so there are new sites popping up all the time, many in fact most never last. Make sure a site has been around a while and is established, look over who else is on the site, anyone you know? Anyone you respect? Does it look like a slapped together directory with stolen photos? Weed out the crap and hone it down to the solid options.  If something offers a free ad and in the top 10 search returns and looks reputable then it might be worth sticking an ad up there and see what happens. If there’s a splashy mall site with a solid reputation in the top 10 then maybe its time to see about what they have to offer, if there’s a review site in the mix and you are a reviewed escort that allows reviews maybe its time to step up a little participation. All things to think about. If that review site has an ad section, get a price list. Then do a cost benefit analysis. If i spend X, i expect to make X in return. Then track as best you can those results. If it pays off great take that ad out again. If it doesn’t then cancel that ad. Remember the Internet is ever changing so you want to fine tune your potential ads all the time. A site that seems great may stop working and its time to move on to something else or maybe a site that under performed made some changes and is performing better so you want to give it a second try. This is an ongoing battle one that you will have to adapt too all the time. It will drive you nuts but its worth the effort and your time.

Do all the free advertising you can and by that I mean, If you like to blog then write a blog, If you like to take pictures of what you had for lunch then get an Instagram, if you enjoy reposting sexy photos give Tumblr a try. Of course tweet but remember this is your work persona and keep that in mind when you are tweeting up a storm. Make sure if you use 3rd party sites that you carefully read their TOS and keep it clean if they require that. You don’t want to get kicked off sites just when your marketing was starting to pay off there.

Find out what works for you. Invest your advertising dollars wisely. Then go out there and bring home the bacon.

Orange IS the new black

Nix the BlackWhat should one wear to shoot porn or fetish smut in? I’ll give you a hint: it isn’t black (or busy patterns). Why not black? Well, the truth of the matter is people aren’t buying your porn or fetish smut for the artist value or breathtaking cinematography. Your videos (or cam shows) are purchased for the simple fact that someone out there wants to fap or schlick to you. They want to see your body!! You only have a small gif, preview or thumbnail to catch their attention, and you want to stand out. Bright colors draw people in, as well as making it easier to see your body. Black does hide flaws and make your body appear more slender, which is great when you’re going to a job interview or out on a date, but when someone is watching you online, they want to see you, and every inch, curve, scar, or tattoo that you have. The way black is picked up on camera makes it very hard to see curves, which in turn makes it hard for your client to appreciate every aspect of you. Even with clients seeking domination, they want to see your body. You can be dominant and kinky in any color; black and red aren’t a required uniform. Your personality should be dominant enough to make it so you can do your job in the brightest of colors.

As with every rule, there are exceptions. There are a few wardrobe staples that you need to own in black (depending on what you’re doing, exactly):

  1. High heels
  2. Pencil Skirt
  3. Bra & Panty set
  4. Gloves
  5. Shiny/metallic/glittery black anything (the light hits it differently than a flat black and makes seeing your body easier!!)
  6. Black pantyhose or stockings

If you ever pay attention to anything on TV, you’ll rarely see actors wearing black except for formal occasions or work. Start to pay attention how their figures look when they wear black as opposed to a bright color (red, blue, green, whatever). You get a better idea of what someone’s body type is when they wear colors, which is exactly what you want to give your buyers.

Sydney Screams: Fetish Model, Clip Producer, Adult Actress, Radio Talk Show Host

Before You Get Naked On The Internet…

imageOnline based sex work, such as fetish clips and webcamming, is attractive for a lot of reasons. It can be done with just a webcam and an internet connection. You can do it in the comfort of your own home. And you can have as much or as little contact with clients as you want.

But that doesn’t mean it’s all lying around in cozy lingerie and watching the sales emails roll in. It’s WORK.

In the past couple years I’ve helped a lot of people set up their first fetish clips studios. More accurately – I’ve given a lot of people the lessons & tools to do so, complete with filming their first clips. But I’ve also gone out of my way to help people who haven’t done their homework. And that’s not cool. It’s a waste of my time and theirs. This is a guide I rather accidentally compiled from emails I’ve sent to people asking the same questions.

These are the things you need to do BEFORE you open your studio and BEFORE you come to me or Sydney to help you get up and running. We’ve talked a lot about making money filming clips. But we’ve been catering to people already in sex work or perform as fetish models in some capacity. This is more basic. These are the things you need to do FIRST.

1. Choose a hooker name. Don’t even talk to me about filming until you know what you want to call you on camera and the name of your store. Take your time, because you’re kind of stuck with it, but figure it out.

This is also a good place to start developing your Hooker Persona. For a lot of people it’s a fairly organic process, but it’s worth putting some thought into. Are you an evil cunt who lives to cause pain? Sexual being of pure energy whose kink transcends gender? A deliberately generic horny slut who likes getting off on camera. A lot of this will be determined by how your clients perceive you, and will evolve over time, but having a basic idea of how you want to present yourself is helpful.

2. What do you want to do? What are you willing to do? Live webcamming? Filming porn? Filming fetish porn? Check out the major sites –  www.streamate.comwww.niteflirt.com, and of course, www.clips4sale.com. See what it takes and what it looks like. Browse the categories. See what sells. See where you might fit in. Then think about what you want to do in greater detail, and perhaps just as importantly, what you DON’T want to do.

I can’t emphasize boundaries enough. They will be pushed consistently and often unexpectedly. Common requests include: nudity, masturbation, anal play/sex, sex toys, tickling, sucking of toes, domination, submission, gay humiliation, racial humiliation, peeing, filming/camming with other people, and some things you never would have imagined. It’s much easier to navigate if you have set your personal boundaries ahead of time.

The #1 priority is to take care of yourself – which will be more emotionally centered with solitary digital based work. Pushing your boundaries out of desperation can lead to extremely dangerous situations. That’s a totally privileged position and there’s a lot of political shit inherent in saying that, but highly applicable to the majority our audience here. Don’t put up with shit you’re not ok with just because you might make a few bucks off of it.

3. Do the paperwork. If you’re not ok with sites like the aforementioned having your legal information or records of your income, stop now. Otherwise, get yourself to a scanner or fax machine. Fill out their forms. Scan your IDs. Send in your tax forms. Whatever else it takes to get approved (it’s been a while… I don’t remember the specifics.) It usually takes a couple days to get approved, but you can keep working to be ready for launch while you wait!

4. How out are you ok being? Are you ok showing your face? Are you ok with your parents, friends, co-workers, future lovers, or future employers finding out? Or at least prepared for that possibility? Once your image hits the internet, especially in a sexy porny context, you can pretty much consider it immortalized. There’s no going back. You can get a lot of distance and erase as much as possible… but the internet has a long memory.

5. Know the Deal. In my experience the money I make from online based sex work is directly proportional to the time and effort I put into it. This is a slow burn kind of field. Each clip you sell will earn you about $3-$5 on average, but that can start to really add up over time. You may have 4 shitty hours on cam and then have an hour long private that rains tips on you. And either way you usually won’t see that money immediately unless you’re working independently, which I know too little about to give good advice on.

Payouts for clips sites generally happen monthly. Cam sites generally pay either weekly or bi-weekly. Are you able to sustain yourself on that? And both will take a significant percentage of your total sales. Look up how much and set your prices accordingly.

It takes both hard work and a bit of patience. It takes a while to build a customer base, especially in a niche market. You won’t make a boat load of money quickly. But you can lay the foundation for sustainable and relatively passive income down the line.

Congratulations! You made it this far! You’ve set up your studio/cam profile and are ready to start earning those sweet paychecks! Now get your sexy butt/feet/mouth on camera!

And while you’re editing / updating come back here and read these:

4 Easy Ways To Increase Your Clip Sales

Dealing With Rolls While Camming Part 1

Make More Money From Fetish Clips

Consistency Is Key

Lauren Kiley: Webcam Girl, Fetish Performer, Fetish Clip Producer, Former Escort, Activist, Dirty Girl Next Door.