Tag Archives: Escorting

Escort safety in the age of SESTA – From Escort-Ads Dot Com

Escort-Ads.com is not a US based escort ad site and they had some solid advice on ways to stay safe. The most compelling on their list is Host your personal website on a server in a country where prostitution is legal. This  is very good advice. Though SESTA takes aim at advertising sites where sites can be held responsible for their users behavior, no one really knows how US Hosting sites will react and what preemptive measures they will take with hosting escort websites.  You might find your site has once day been disappeared.

My suggestion is to put up a second site hosting in a country where prostitution is legal and forward your current site to  the new one.

Here is the link to the Escord-Ads post about ways to stay safe. Also there is some very good information about ICANN and what the US has jurisdiction on.

https://www.escort-ads.com/news/sesta-update-list-solutions

Yes, this will cost some money but honestly its not cost prohibitive and its important to do even if its just for your own peace of mind. No one knows whats going to happen. City-Vibe, Reddit, Craigslist Personals  have all made changes and the law isn’t even signed yet.

Be proactive! Be safe!

 

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Escort Safety in the age of SESTA – From Harlot Advocate

Congress did it, 97-2 they fucked escorts in the name of human trafficking. Trafficking hysteria has captured to minds of our elected officials, once again. All except for Ron Wyden and Ron fucking Paul.

I’m going to try to collect all the best advice I  can to help escorts stay safe with this new law that is waiting the Orange resident of the oval offices signature.

First up is from: @HarlotAdvocate   On Twitter.

I don’t personally know her… BUT shes got some real solid, reasonable advice on how to be safer.  Her Step by Step Guide on  how to stay safe if advertising avenues are shut down. As seen on Twitter and posted here, with her permission.

1. Commit an entire day from your calendar to follow these steps. Then bring a bucket of green tea, water, coffee, a bottle of two of wine to set the mood cause it’s a lot of work.

2. Log into your current email & start to organize.. Listing in this order the A) The Contributors/Providers States.
B) Which Contributors/Providers Have Been Seen & Safe.
C) Which Contributors Are Just PreScreened.
D) Who is Professional.
E) Who Is Not.
F) Who is Blocked.

3. Open 2 Proton Mail Accounts.
A) One for professional business name.
B) Second for recovery email.

Or use the amazing @SafeOffice because they are literally that awesome!

4. After you have organized your original professional email into those folders… Transfer that information them over to the new professional email accounts I have listed above that you have made for yourself.

5. Yes it is a ton of work but trust me your email and organizing is your absolute best option for maintaining clients & contributor relationships.
“If it’s based overseas you are good to go.”

6. Make an announcement to the clients that you are closing your old email accounts associated within wonderful USA & if you so choose send them to your new email address.

7. Drink whatever you need, bathroom breaks were not done.

8. Go to each of your advertisement platforms that are based in the US and remove any and all special keywords that can be associated with sex work. Such as uncheck that incall/outcall, roses, gfe girlfriend etc, pricing unless on your website.

9. Treat each US based advertising platform as a profile for strictly dating.. Like think your looking for a breath taking “dating profile.” Keep that thought, and write your content appropriately.

10. (missing in the line up)

11. Go on your twitter and social platforms and clean house. Remove anything and everything that can or will be perceived as a worker verses a dating profile. This included comments, DM messages, paid profile links, etc that allude to worker status verses dating status.

12. Contributors This Is For You.
No MORE DMs.. You need to approach only through email… That’s it.. Do not waste a dating profiles time when you are just seeking an emotional connection.. This puts them at risk. Stop it and keep it professional.

13. Girls with phones…. We all have them or used too. DO NOT USE YOUR PERSONAL PHONE FOR ANY WORK PURPOSES. You have two phones for two reasons you do not ever mix the two. One is for booking dating spots, one is for checking your grocery lists.

14. Girls with phones.. USE A VPN AT ALL TIMES. Keep it on the minute that phone is on and the minute that phone is off. That simple! Your preferred form of contact should always be email, from the new email you have provided.

15. When posting photo pictures from your cell phone.. Keep that VPN ON. Make sure you always always screenshot at least 5-6 times, zooming in, and posting it then.

16. Providers DO NOT POST cell phone pictures from the hotel you are staying at unless there is nothing that identifies that room. Still for me personally it’s a huge no no hence I don’t do it.

17. Providers & Contributors quit tagging the location where you are at while you are still there. That is just blatantly putting it out there!

18. Discretion is key to staying busy. Supporting one another is the key to keeping safe. Avoid the drama like the plague. Follow all my steps listed above and you will be good to go!

There you have it folks. I know its a lot of work, you know whats more work? Trying to get out on bail for a federal crime or trying to make rent with no job. 

Stay Safe Ladies….

Helpful links:

Safe Office:  https://safeoffice.com/lp/

What is a VPN: https://www.techradar.com/news/what-is-a-vpn

Burner Phones: https://www.usatoday.com/story/tech/columnist/saltzman/2016/09/17/whats-a-burner-phone/90382874/

SWOP: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sex_Workers_Outreach_Project_USA

How to find your government reps: https://whoismyrepresentative.com/

ACLU: https://www.aclu.org/

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Backpage went poof!

Backpage was shut down. What happens next is panic. I know, I lived though the shut down of the Craig’s List Adult Services shut down. Try to stay calm. You will be okay, develop a new plan. Get to work implementing it.

Read this from a couple years ago, it was written after Redbook disappeared:  https://fairywhoremother.com/4-things-you-can-do-when-your-advertising-venue-disappears/

Here is a running list of places to advertise that still exist. (as of Jan 2017) Some of these cost money, some don’t. Some might be for local areas, others are nationwide. Do your research, see what works for you. Most of all know you will be OK. This happens, it sucks but you are a sex worker you’re already resourceful.  (if you have any sites to ad to this list  please reach out so i can add them. jenny@goodtimejenny.com or on Twitter @jennydemilo )

http://www.eros.com/

http://www.cityvibe.com/

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Escort support services and staying above the fray

broken-trustEscort support services. Some are needed, others are looking to rip you off. Some you love, others you quite frankly hate. They are often a necessary evil when you’re an escort (or any sex worker really) They are your advertising venues, your photographers, your screening and safety services, your copy writers, web developers and marketing experts. You need what they  have to offer and they need your money.  It’s hard to trust them in this often dicey business. Its hard to trust anyone when what you do isn’t always legal. Some require your IDs ( advertising venues) others take sensitive photos of you (Photographers) some need your passwords (web developers) Some you trust to keep you safe when meeting clients (screening services) As an escort you make a calculated risk assessment on who to trust with your sensitive information and lets face it your money. They all want your money. Some provide value for service still others are trying to rip you off.

Some things to keep in mind when evaluating trust for an escort support service. Are they above the fray?

1. Do they get involved in petty fights?

Are they meddling in the business of escorts? Pitting them against each other on a message board to garner support for their position on something? Or fighting so hard for your money that they denigrate their competitors? Example: Does your screening or safety service bad mouth their competitors? Yes, they all want your business but do they actively try to get that business by putting down their competition using scare tactics, innuendo, rumor (often started by them) or any other backhanded means. IE do they talk a lot of shit publicly or with a whisper campaign. If they do watch out. Thats not professional and do you really want YOUR name and reputation associated with people who act like that. Not to mention they could and would those same tactics against you if they felt you in any way posed a threat to their business.

2. Are they professional in their communications?

Do they call you sweetie in a business email. Are they overly friendly leaning toward creepy because you have nude pictures on your website? Do they ask inappropriate questions or steer any business conversations towards sex. HUGE red flags. Run don’t walk to someone who will treat you with respect. This is your business not hot talk central.

3. Do they treat you like a professional person or like a dumb whore with too much money?

People often think escorting is recession proof. That escorts are rolling in dough 24/7. They also often think that escorts are too stupid to do anything other then fuck for money. Which is far from the truth but there are those support services that see you as marks. They should treat you professionally and if you at all get a whiff that they see you as someone to take advantage of then find someone else because they are not trustworthy.

4. Do they have an established long standing reputation?

Being in business a long time as an escort support service doesn’t automatically mean their trustworthy. However having a long standing reputation in a business atmosphere with a lot of turn over should carry weight. All business have their ups and downs but you generally want to deal with people who have more ups then downs. People who opt to stay out of the fray and drama. People who are known for not being busy bodies, belittlers, or shady. If a support service has too many incidents of  “he said she says” then I tend to stay away. New support service business are popping up all the time and just because someone is new doesn’t mean you should dismiss them out of hand but a splashy flashy website should take a back seat to a reference from a trusted colleague. You cant please 100% of the people all the time  and if a support business has been in business long enough you will have likely pissed someone off. However what kind of pissing off did they do? Did they over charge someone and then rectified the mistake? Or did they give out an escorts real name address and phone number because she pissed them off? All of that needs to be considered when weighing a supports service trustworthiness.

Be wary of any support services that tries to woo you into helping them by giving out personal information on competitors or how they do business.  The support services that stay in business the longest and have the best reputations are the ones that stay out of all that. That provide value for money and are discreet when they need to be and professional always. You vet your clients to make sure they are safe you should be doing the same with your escort support services.

Jenny DeMilo: Dominatrix, Hypno-Domme and former GFE Escort

Follow Jenny DeMilo on Twitter

Do The Math

back-to-school-retro-school-classroom-1408441525-view-0If you’re new to escorting or even if you’re not new sometimes its hard to tell what it is you really need to have to make money. As an independent escort it your own business and as with all business it takes money to make money. You can cut down on some of those costs by putting in a little time into figuring out what you really need to spend your money on and what you don’t. Making sure in the process to get value for money. Website: Though you don’t need a website to be an escort, it’s probably a good idea to get one.  Having a website shows some measure of legitimacy. If you are a little web savvy you can put up your own site. If not there are people who can do that for you. What they charge will vary far and wide. What you will get for that money will also vary. You should think carefully about what it is you want and what you are willing to pay to get it. A simple site works just as well as a very complicated site with all the bells and whistles. If you hire a web person to make you a site who does a lot of escort sites, make sure to do what you can to make your site look unique. You don’t want to look like everyone else. Your site should reflect you. Think about it from your client side, he’s weeding though a lot of sites and though a lot of potential escorts. Stand out! Oh and for gods sake if you put up your own site pay for your own hosting and a domain name. Don’t use a free site thats asking for trouble. Many are not adult friendly and you run the risk of waking up one day and your sites been deleted.

Photography: Every escort needs photos. Photos are going to sell you to potential clients more then anything else you do. Think about what image you want to project. Are you sweet and young? Are you dominating and fierce?  Are you quirky and alternative? What ever your assets are you want to project those in your photos.  Don’t just hire the dude who shoots all the hookers. What that is going to get you is your photos will look like all the other hookers photos. Hire someone you’re comfortable with (lots of creepy dudes with cameras out there), that you can trust (especially if you don’t show your face), who will design a shoot that is unique to you. Get references from other women in the business. Really look at someones portfolio. If they have 100 photos of skinny girls in lingerie and you’re fuller figured then that’s not your guy. If all they have to show are photos of white girls and you are a different shade then thats not your guy. If their portfolios are filled with pictures of landscapes and puppies then id think twice about spending your hard earned cash on that guy. Make sure they can do what it is you want and that they aren’t just putting up their lucky shots. Remember its easy to make a model… look like a model. Prices will also vary a lot so shop around.  If an average shoot in your area with a sex worker friendly photographer is 300 bucks and that gets you a set of usable retouched photos, then what should you get for a 1200 shoot? Also remember that as an escort you need to get new photos often, keep that in mind so when you are budgeting for shoots.You will need to do at least one shoot a year and you probably should do two.

Video: This is a thing now and frankly I don’t know why. Oh I know why some “clients” might like them. These are the same guys who can’t pull the trigger unless a girls got 500 reviews. But video isn’t necessary. It’s not a thing you need to have to work, even at the high end. Anyone that tells you that is selling something.  Does everyone need to have a Victoria Secrets style video to promote herself? The short answer is no.

Advertising: This is something you will need to invest in and put in some trail and error. Not all advertising works for all girls. Your BFF might really get a lot of work off a site that you get nothing off of. People in New York might pay for ads on a site that works, while in Detroit that same site will suck for bringing in clients. There is not rhyme or reason to it. The best thing you can do is set yourself a monthly advertising budget and then see what works for you. Try different things one at a time, then measure the success. Make sure you track hits to your website and ask your clients where they saw your ad. Not all of them will remember and some will get it wrong but absent of a customer satisfaction survey its the best you have to measure whats working. Also think of non traditional advertising venues like review boards, screening sites and social media.

Putting a little thought and time into determining what it is you need then adding up what that will cost is the best thing you can do for your business. You don’t need a ton of money but you should be setting some aside for these types of things. Do the math. Lots of people out there are looking to take advantage of you because they think you are rolling in escort dough and if you are new there are people who will tell you you need all the things and you can buy them from them of course. Be smart, be skeptical and don’t get taken advantage of.

Jenny DeMilo: Dominatrix, Hypno-Domme and former GFE Escort

Follow Jenny DeMilo on Twitter