Category Archives: Escorting

Double Time

The other day, I had a noon duo scheduled with a regular of mine. My duo partner, Amy, had never seen him before, but we have great chemistry and I knew he’d love her. I curled my hair, put on roughly seventeen pounds of makeup, and shimmied into garters, stockings, and heels. I made the bed, put on some music, set out condoms, and lit candles. Then, I waited. And at 11:48, Amy came flying into my incall studio in a panic. “Oh, my god! How do you work if you’re on your period? I’m on day 4, and I don’t know what to dooooo!” Now. We scheduled the duo three days prior, so when I asked if she was available, she already knew that The Shining was happening in her no-no bits. She had three days to ask for advice, or use Mr. Google to figure out her shit, but she didn’t. She waited until ten minutes before the client arrived to make her crisis my problem. Fortunately, I’m a boy scout when it comes to being prepared, and I fixed her up with some makeup sponges while briefing her on our client. Then I let her borrow some scissors to trim her bikini area. Then I let her use my deodorant and some hair product. Then I lent her something to wear, because she didn’t bring any lingerie. Then I stashed her stuff in the closet while she threw on some makeup before he arrived. Fortunately, I knew to be totally prepared before she arrived, because I have come to expect that my last ten minutes before any appointment we take together will be spent managing her crises du jour. And I do it without complaining, because

a) she’s pretty awesome in session

b) I genuinely like her as a person, and my clients like us together

c) I consider it a kind of repayment of a karmic debt for all the times I used to be a shitty, shitty trainwreck of a duo partner myself.

But it doesn’t have to be this way. Your duo partner is a source of extra income, access to different clients, and can even offer emotional support and sometimes mentor-ship. You owe it to each other to show basic courtesy and professionalism.

Let her know what to expect
If you’ve seen the client before, give her a quick rundown on what to expect. He uses an unnecessary amount of tongue when kissing. He loves giving head. He always tries to milk extra time and needs to be shoved out the door. He absolutely loves it when you laugh at his jokes. It’s courteous to share as much as you can about him, so that she feels as prepared as you are, and not like a third wheel trying to catch up. Likewise, if you only show up to work after half a bottle of wine, or smoking a bowl, or whatever, let your partner know. She may not mind if she knows to expect a tipsy/stoned you, but she deserves to have that information ahead of time, especially if she’s sharing her clients with you and needs to know which ones you would be a good match for. Lastly, check in with each other about how bisexual you each actually are, and how gay you’re willing to be for pay. If you are cool with making out, but not muff diving, make it clear before your client begs to watch you go down on each other.

Have her back
If you take ten minutes to discuss your boundaries ahead of time, you’ll spare yourselves awkward negotiations in-session. Your client may throat fuck you every time, but if you know she’s got a touchy gag reflex, you can make sure you’re the one doing the oral, and she can be the one to do the actual sexing. Help her stay in her comfort zone, and she’ll help you stay in yours.

Be on time
And know what that means. When you agree to a session time, ask what time she’d like you there. If you have a noon booking together, your partner may be cool with you breezing in at 11:55, or she may want help setting up, and be grumbling from 11:30 on about how you’re not pulling your weight. Also, leave yourself a cushion of time to help clean up after. If you are hosting the session in your incall, make sure you’ve got enough time that your partner can shower afterward so she isn’t thrown back into her day freshly-shagged. If you’re a guest at your partner’s incall, ask if you can help strip and make the bed, replace candles, or whatever else needs done.

And speaking of incalls…
If your partner hosts your duos at her place, and provides all the supplies, toys, and atmosphere, show a little consideration from time to time. You don’t ever have to buy candles, condoms, massage oil, gloves, wine, bottled water, chocolate, sheets, towels, incense, or pay rent. If you duo regularly under those circumstances, take her to lunch or out for a mani pedi to say thanks. If you duo only once, or once in awhile, a Starbucks card, a couple of fancy chocolates, or a bottle of wine are all nice gestures. It also might be more appropriate just to buy a couple of boxes of her favorite brand of condoms as a way of acknowledging her hospitality. A small gesture goes a long way in showing your duo partner that you value your relationship with her, and can lead to her sharing more business with you in the future. If you’re the one hosting, and want more of a contribution from your duo partner, it’s fair to ask a per-session fee if you’re supplying everything. Keep in mind when choosing your fee, though, that it’s bad form to ask a space-use fee and expect help preparing and cleaning. If you paid for a hotel room, it’s 100% legit to take the cost of the room off the top before splitting the donation, just make sure to mention it to her upfront.

Respect her privacy
This should go without saying, but unfortunately it doesn’t. Make damn sure you’re using her stage name, not her legal name, ever. Don’t tell your clients jack shit about her. Don’t bring up her kids, her hometown, or even her hobbies if she doesn’t bring them up with him first. And don’t talk to other girls about her, either. If she wants to share something about herself, she can. Stick to your own stories, and know that if you talk shit about her to other
people, it will get back to her eventually, and you will come out of it looking like a supreme asshole–and not just to your partner, either. If you can’t respect her privacy, clients will be reluctant to trust you with theirs, and if you’re a gossip behind her back, no other girls will want to work with you. Say she’s beautiful, charming, brilliant, a great kisser–and then shut up.

Beatrice Darling: GFE Escort, Traveling Companion

You can also follow Beatrice on Twitter @missobdurate

Clockwatching For Pros

As sex workers, we charge our clients for our time. Whether we have clients for an hour or charge by the minute, we need to be aware of how much time is passing. At the same time clients understandably are not comfortable or happy with “clockwatchers” who are so focused on the time that they aren’t paying attention to their service. So how do we keep track of time without obsessing over every moment?

1. Playlist

Make a playlist that lasts about as long as you want your session to last. This works well for just about every situation. Have a sensual GFE escorting session? Put together 1 hour and 50 minutes of songs that set a romantic, intimate atmosphere. Doing a gold show striptease? Make an 18 minute playlist of dance music. Basically – shave a couple minutes off your total session/show time for conversation and leeway, set your atmosphere, and when the music stops you know things are wrapping up.

As a bonus you can use your playlist to set the tone and rhythm to your session. You can set the pace as to when things heat up, speed up, and wind down. When you know your music well, you can follow it in your head and know about how much time has past and how much you have left.

2. Safe call

This is good advice for both time and safety. Tell someone where you’re going and how long you expect to be there. When I worked for an agency – this was automatically built into my appointments. I called when I arrived, which signaled the start of the appointment (as well as told them I was ok and comfortable – or that I wasn’t and was leaving) and five minutes before the end of the appointment I received a call asking if we were extending the session or not. If I didn’t answer or call back within fifteen minutes they would know I was in crisis and call the cops. You can recreate that with a friend or colleague.

3. Alarm

You can also fake a safe call with the use of the alarm clock app on your phone. You can set it to sound like a ringtone, fake answer the phone, and let the client or producer think that someone is looking out for you. It’s not ideal, but it will keep you on track of time, and perhaps give you an extra layer of security.

4. Stopwatch

This really only works for sex work that doesn’t occur in person. But when I am in a private show on cam I have a stopwatch next to the computer so I can easily see how much time is passing. It’s easier than trying to do math by the clock and helps me keep a good rhythm for the show – which can also extend a show by a couple minutes – which increases your income! On the phone it’s super easy because, well, most cell phones tell you how long your call has lasted and all you have to do is check it. Skype does the same thing.

5. Convenient Placement

If you hate all those options and have the option of designing your own incall – put lots of clocks in convenient places that you can check without being obvious. You can make them pretty so it’s not blatant that your room is designed for a session to run like clockwork. You can also use mirrors to reflect the time around the room if you know where to look. And you will know – the clients won’t. Test your room out to see if you can see the time in a variety of locations and positions around the room.

After a while most people develop an internal clock and can mentally keep track of time. For some of us, keeping track of time is a challenge. I rely on gadgets and tricks because my brain doesn’t do it for me. Know your weaknesses and find ways to work around them.

Lauren Kiley: Webcam Girl, Fetish Performer, Fetish Clip Producer, Former Escort, Activist, Dirty Girl Next Door.

The Choice Is Critical

An assistant is just that someone to assist you with your daily tasks, in hookerland this means; phones, emails and screening. Over the past 2 years I’ve had the pleasure of using a fabulous assistant when I needed a little extra help on tour. However I’ve been lucky. Many escorts run into serious issues with the assistant they have hired or  or fired. Extortion, blackballing, public outings and client black booking are just a few of the issues. I’m hoping with the advice here you are able to find your perfect assistant.

1. No one knows ho business like a ho

You should only hire a retired escort. She knows first hand what can happen if screening isn’t up to par (like jail or death) Your everyday person isn’t going to know how or where to begin screening your potential clients or how to spot a potential issue.

2. A great assistant will never pretend to be you.

How sketchy would it be to talk to someone on the phone then meet them later in the day, their voice is different and they can’t recall what you talked about? You’d head straight for the door if this happened. You’re a busy professional, you’ve hired help, show it off.  Be up front on your website and ads about having an assistant. This should nip any confusion in the butt.

3. References

In our world reputation is everything! Any assistant you are interested in hiring should provide you with references of current or former employers. Do not accept the “client confidentiality” BS. I will gladly vouch for my former assistant via email or phone anytime she needs me to. I suggest you email the references and ask for a little phone time as well asking questions like,  how long services were used, what was provided, any issues, any areas that could use improvement, client opinions of the assistant and why they’re no longer using the services.

4. Price

NEVER EVER pay an assistant a percentage of your income or a fee per booking, this gives incentive to cut corners and take risks to make more money. As a general rule of thumb you should pay your hourly rate per week. Industry average is $400 per week. If you can’t afford that you need a new business plan not an assistant.

5. Services Provided

This is never the same from assistant to assistant. First determine what you need. For myself it was phone help as I loath talking on the phone but why not take advantage of a package deal when offered?  Phones, emails, screening, booking, travel arrangements, check in/out, the possibilities are endless.

Finding the right assistant isn’t easy and it shouldn’t be. You are entrusting someone with your well being and safety not just getting a little extra phone help. Be smart about it, chose carefully, think though all the possible ramifications and potential pitfalls. The extra time it takes to make a smart decision is well worth the effort.

Ginger McNaughty: National Touring Escort

Follow Ginger on Twitter @GingerMcNaughty

How To Protect Your Brand

I’m here to deliver some bad news: if you’re an independent escort who writes her own web copy, there’s a good chance someone else is going to steal it. The higher your visibility, i.e. the more you advertise, the better odds are of this happening, and of happening more than once. (I’ve even had wannabe straight gigolos steal my content!) Short of going completely UTR and hoping no thieves find you, what options do you have to deal with plagiarism?

Make your mark, don’t steal it

First, give yourself permission to protect your work. I hate confrontation, so even though nothing makes me angrier than being ripped off, I dread that reply email from the person I’m calling out. Steel your nerves by reminding yourself that you’re a professional, you created something original—and valuable—in the service of promoting your business, and someone else stole it for their own gain. This is not okay and it’s not harmless regardless of how green or ditzy the girl (or guy) who stole from you may be. You can get moral support from friends before taking action if you’re feeling a little unsure, and if they’re fellow working girls, they’d probably appreciate a heads up anyway about who among us isn’t as ethical as she should be. (I also derive a lot of encouragement from this comprehensive Amanda Brooks post capturing all the agony of having to deal with content thieves.) http://www.texasgoldengirl.com/afterhours/escort-plagarism/#more-954

Second, give the thief an easy way out. It pains me to admit it, but this is definitely a situation where you’ll get better results by swallowing your righteous anger and trying to sound sweet regardless of how furious you feel. Few people respond with grace when they’re caught doing something so obviously wrong, so whatever you do, don’t expect an apology or admission of guilt. Clench your teeth and type out something along the lines of “Dear Tiffanie, your pictures are simply adorable and you seem like a great girl but I noticed that you’ve inadvertently repeated some of the text I wrote for my own site. Can you please have your webmaster take down the following sections?” It’s a really good idea to let your first draft sit for at least a day so you can try to smooth out any lingering bitterness that’s come through.

Go ahead and let the culprit blame the copying on a web designer or a well-meaning client or a boyfriend, or her own crazy memory that allows her to mistake entire sentences of other people’s writing for her own. She’ll save face and you get what you want—hopefully.

Some friends of mine have offered to help the offender write her own text, or flat out ghost write it for her for free, which is something I would never be able to bring myself to do. However, I respect that approach for its generosity and you may have some luck with it. One of my friends explained this approach by saying, “I knew she’d never take me up on it,” but I’m not so sure about that. Definitely don’t offer this if you aren’t willing to follow through or she’ll probably feel justified in defaulting back to using yours.

Third, make it harder for people to steal from you. If you don’t care for visibly watermarking your images, you can use a digital watermark. Have your website designer code your pages so that it’s not possible to highlight and copy text. Thieves are by definition lazy, so this will have an impact right away, though on sites like Eros and Cityvibe they will still be able to lift your words.

Fourth, stay alert. Use services like Copyscape (http://copyscape.com) or set up google alerts on some of your more distinctive phrases. DMCA is really the best place to register with because it holds the most sway with hosts, and has the best luck of getting a site taken offline or modified when your entreaties to the escort herself (or himself) have gone unrewarded. (You can learn a little more about DMCA here, http://brainz.org/dmca-takedown-101/ You can also google pieces of your text now and then—lots of girls do this—and see what turns up. As you develop a place in the community, other escorts will let you know when they see your work on someone else’s page. Respond to it! Go back and read the first rule if you start feeling fatigued by all the policing you have to do.

Fifth, recognize when it’s time for no more Ms. Nice Escort. I use a copyright consultant to keep an eye on all of my content because I believe it needs to be done but I don’t want to have to do it myself. Instead of emailing someone directly now, I usually just ask him to send a DMCA notice to their host. This costs extra money but it’s worth it to me. I don’t have any more patience or energy to spare on arguing with someone who’s stolen from me, so I just go straight to the big guns whenever possible.

Sixth, recognize when it’s time to let it go. Some offenders will have been lucky enough to set up shop with a belligerent or lackadaisical host who won’t respond to your notices, or she may have tweaked your own paragraphs just enough to claim that it’s all a big coincidence (even if you and I and everyone else with a brain can see differently.) People who take short cuts are not destined for much success. Rest easy in the fact that they won’t be able to deliver in person what your scintillating, personalized prose promised.

Or, depending on what exactly they’ve stolen, you might take a different view entirely. A few lines I wrote about welcoming clients with disability have been stolen verbatim so many times over the years that it’s practically become standard industry practice to include it on a site or ad. And that’s okay. Those little bits related to protocol aren’t what distinguishes your personality, anyway.

Keep in mind through all of this that no matter how frustrated you may be by the plagiarism, you’ve got an ace up your sleeve that the plagiarists don’t. You can always write more unique, beguiling passages that attract the type of clients you want. If you’ve done it once, you’ve got the intelligence and creativity to do it again. Odds are, your copycats will continue to be unoriginal and opportunistic, rounding up the back of the pack while looking to people like you to try to understand what creates success. They’re simply not real threats. Of the two of you, you’re the one with the upper hand.

Avery Moore: High-End Escort, Traveling Companion

Staying Under The Hotel Radar

Traveling isn’t easy when you’re escorting. It can take a physical toll, worse it can take an emotional toll. Being away from home and all your creature comforts is harder then you may think, especially if you travel for more then a few days at a time. The last thing you want is to be hassled by the front desk or hotel management for being a hooker. Here are some tips on ways to keep under the radar when working out of a hotel on tour.

1. Steal towels from the maids cart: You’re going to need extra towels, hotels are getting stingier with them all the time. Plus sometime clients hog and use up all your towels. You really don’t want to be calling the maid every day or even several times a day asking for extra towels. Thats a giant red flag and will get you pegged as a hooker straight off the bat. If you see the maids cart (and how can you miss it) causally and with out being noticed take a handful of towels back to your room and stow them in your closet. Put out one fresh towel for each client, don’t give them the option to use up all your towels.

2. If you need to ask the maid for towels, TIP HER: Sometimes you need towels and you just cant find that maids cart to nick them from (FYI: look on other floors too) You have no choice but to call housekeeping and ask for fresh towels. When the maid comes to your door with them, tip her! Hand her five bucks say thank you, be nice to her and smile. She will be more then happy to give you the towels and be more likely to just turn a blind eye as to why a single female traveler needs all these goddamn towels. She may even ask you in the hall next time she sees you if you need any towels or anything for your room. Win her over with cash.

3. Take out your own trash: The last thing you want to do is bring unneeded or unwanted attention to yourself with a trash can full if condom wrappers.  Take out your own trash. Usually theres a trash can somewhere by the ice machine. Scope it out so you know where it is and take out your own trash. The less suspicion on you the better

4. Scope out the alternative entrances:  Tell your clients how to get to your room without going by the front desk. You would think this was a no brainer but its not. Trust me they don’t wanna go by the front desk anyways so give them the alternative route. If there is no alternative route available, tell your clients how to directly walk to the elevators so they don’t have to ask anyone for directions. Sometimes the elevators are hidden and its better when they can walk though the lobby like they know where they are going.

5. Do not register your hotel room with your hooker number: Hotels have taken to using the Google if they are suspicious of you. Some hotels just do it as a mater of course on all single female guests. Do not register/rent your room with your working number, use your personal cell number or a google voice number you have reserved just for hotel rentals. You don’t want a nosy, snoopy manager to google your number and see your 100 ads for escorting. That will only get you tossed out, extorted for free service if the guy is a super creep, or worse they will call the cops and try to get you arrested. (FYI never talk to the cops)

6. Always tip housekeeping: This also would seems like a no brainer but yet it’s not. Tip your maids and tip them well. If you have your room made up every day, tip them every day. If you’re like me and rarely take advantage of maid service, then tip them at the end of your stay even if you think they didn’t do much. They did do something, they didn’t rat you out to management and some hotels offer bounties on that kinda thing. The maids will always know whats what in a hotel. They see who comes and goes, they see you opening your door to that weird overweight guy who looks nervous and out of place. They are the eyes and ears of the place, they know you’re working out of that room so buy their silence with cold hard cash.  Don’t get greedy and forget to tip your maids. Its the cost of doing business and Its worth every penny you spend.

 

Jenny DeMilo: Dominatrix, GFE Escort, Fetish Clip Producer, Phone Sex Operator and Hypno-Domme.